[Norwegian84]

I would say it's better, in case he continues being curious, to let him try when he wants in a controlled environment (with you) than to have him try by himself. It is quite a way from a drag or a few every now and then to becoming a smoker.

[masklofumanto]

Originally Posted by MarlboroRedGuy Had a discussion with the wife about what happened yesterday. She agrees he is too young to be smoking but she is handing me the reigns on this one. She said she doesnt want him smoking without me and so we both are going to keep our cigarettes out of easy to grab places. So far it's been 3 drags. I am going to wait and see what he does next weekend if he asks I will explain to him this is not going to be an all the time thing. If he doesn't ask I think I will bring it up and tell him we really need to wait a bit. I don't think a drag here and there will be bad but I don't want him smoking like I was at his age.

In my opinion, allowing "a drag here or there" sends a mixed message, and children that age need clarity. If you don't want him smoking like you did at his age, then hold the line firmly and tell him he has to wait until he's "x" years old. Furthermore, allowing even just "a drag here or there" may result in nicotine dependency, if recent studies are to be believed, so that his becoming a smoker at a very early age might become a predetermined outcome.

[pasmoke]

He’s right, you’re cool. If he’s curious he might as well experience his first smoke with you rather than sneaking around behind your back like I did when I was 8.

[Newportlover82]

I agree with everyone on here that it was best to satisfy his curiosity with you rather than with his friends or sneaking one of you cigarettes and doing it by himself. I don't have any kids but from what i believe is all kids are going to be curious about things their parents do in front of them on a regular bases espically if they look up to them like your son does. So it is almost impossible to avoid their curiosity espically when it comes to something like smoking. My dad's parents were heavy smokers when i was a kid and spent a lot of time with them after school and during the summer. I too got very curious seeing them smoke all the time i never had the curage to as them if i could try it but i would wanted to so bad. My grandmother probably would have if i cought her in the right mood. Anyway what i am trying to say is you did the right thing and the only way to have possibly avoided him being so curious was to not smoke around him. I know that does not sound very great. I am not trying to tell any one what they should and should not do around their kids but it is just an idea. Me personally started smoking on my own at the age of 19 and my parents were anti smoking so i decided as an adult to try it. I wish i had a dad like you growing up i would have started much sooner than 19.

[Marlboroman39]

People can parent as they see fit. Everyone is different and only the parents know the maturity level of the child and can use their own discretion. I wouldn’t encourage someone to let a 10 year old try it, however if it’s not my child it’s not my place to judge someone for allowing a child to try smoking.

[G_H]

Originally Posted by Marlboroman39 People can parent as they see fit. Everyone is different and only the parents know the maturity level of the child and can use their own discretion. I wouldn’t encourage someone to let a 10 year old try it, however if it’s not my child it’s not my place to judge someone for allowing a child to try smoking.

Completely agree.....what we did with our kids was our responsibility....you have your own choices to make.

[Bouke]

Originally Posted by MarlboroRedGuy This morning while my wife is out shopping with her mom aunts and sister in law my 10yr old son comes to me as I am catching up on some emails while a Christmas movie provides background noise. The Saturday morning routine is the ladies get together while the men (son and myself) do some yard work and such. Anyways as I'm finishing up an email for a client with a Red dangling my son walks into the family room and sits down makes a comment about my ash getting long and as i flick it he says "I think you are the coolest dad". My initial thought was "what the hell did you break or do?" but I just said "oh you do?" he then asks some questions about how it tastes and how it feels. The next question got me "Dad, do you think I can try a puff of your cigarette?" So I let him have a little drag. When I told him about inhaling and showed him he wanted to try it. So I let him have one inhale and then I finished the cigarette. I told him it will be our little secret that he smoked this morning but I am going to fill the wife in just in case he swipes a cigarette. I'm glad I got to share that moment with him but I feel he is too young to be smoking so I don't know if this will become a Saturday morning routine for us but I am going to see if he asks next week.

My boyfriend started smoking this way when he was 11. At first maybe a drag once or twice a week but after a while he was allowed to light his father’s cigarettes regularly and by the time he turned 12 he had his own pack, which his dad kept in his desk. Officially he was only allowed to smoke together with his dad but he told me he would take cigarettes and packs from his parents and smoke behind their backs so it is smart that you put your cigarettes in a place your son can’t take them. By the time my boyfriend turned 13 his parents realized he was hooked and he got the ok to smoke when he was home.

[MarlboroRedGuy]

Week later update With my inlaws in town and staying here he told me he doesnt want grandma or grandpa to know he smoked last week. I said well then dont smoke until they are gone. He's afraid his good boy image will be ruined with them (and my mother in law is quite an anti). I took some time to confess to him that I didnt think it was a good idea for him to smoke every week and I would like him to wait until his 12th birthday before we discuss any more. I stated that if I felt the time was right I'd offer him a drag and asked him not to smoke without me around.

[Carol Smokes]

I also think 10 is too young but not my place to say... and I may have done worse.

Years ago, I always smoked outside and hidden it from my daughter, or I would wait for her to go to bed and then smoke later at night in the house.

When she was 6 I found her pretending to smoke with one of my cigarettes and I was shocked by it. The only good thing is that it wasn't lit. I took it away from her and told her never to touch them again.

I was still very upset about it hours later and then, in some anger, I decided to teach her a lesson. I had her sit with me on the sofa and told her we were going to smoke. She got scared and said she didn't want to, but then I smoked and made sure she got a lot of smoke from me.

I still feel bad about doing that, but she hasn't touched a cigarette since.


Carol

[Ryan1991]

I have a twelve year old son who is now a regular smoker - I smoke openly in the house and it is just normal. He has a younger brother who is 10. Yesterday in the haze of Christmas Day he asked to have a smoke when his brother and me were smoking / his brother gave him one - he coughed his guts up, but I think it is the start of him smoking - I think 10 is too old, but as others have said, if he wants to he will find some way to do it. Boys with their mom today, but will see what tomorrow brings.